The few who were attending this mini conference shuffled in, about nineteen in all.
“Where’s Andy? I thought he was coming today?” Marie asked as the small desks they were sitting at reminded her of long lost school days.
Margaret looked up after sorting her coloured pens into order. “Oh, he has an aunt who lives near this way and so decided as to keep fit, he’d cycle in.”
“How close?”
“About ten miles I believe.”
Dirk walked in with sunglasses and avoided looking at anyone connected with this hotel.
“Ah the sex pest has arrived!” Margaret shouted for all to hear. “That’s all what this world is obsessed with is sex.”
“Keep it down love, tell everyone I got told off by the hotel manager. Anyway I’m not a sex pest, makes me sound like some of the nutters we have at our mental home.”
“Well, you are a pest, but you don’t get any sex, so we’ll just leave you with the label pervert, as in sex pervert.”
“Gee thanks Marg for your sympathy.”
“I have no sympathy for those who cannot keep their loins girded at all times, especially in public.” Then she saw David. “Oh my lord, talking about odd shapes, what have you been doing down your trousers.”
Marie took one look and burst out laughing while Dirk went all pale followed with. “I think I’m going to be sick!”
“Chemical metal did this.”
“If you are that short in that department; go to a plastic surgeon or some’in. Bloomin hell mate, looks like doctor Frankinstein’s been down there.”
“I couldn’t help it if my metal went rock hard in my pants and shaped them in a bulging position.”
“Okay, okay! Enough of this talk and sit down dear, everyone is starting to look this way.” Margaret ordered before turning away and covering her face from the onlookers.
Dirk then observed a fellow worker whom he hadn’t seen before. “Hey a chick from another nut house, gotta say hello to her and show her my dazzling...”
“I wouldn’t, it scared that poor girl last night half to death.”
“Smile Robin, just my smile.”
“Eh up here comes Andy action man now!” Margaret almost laughed. “Looks ridiculous in those cycle shorts and funny shoes.”
“Looks like a frog which has hopped into the wrong pond.” Marie added and Robin agreed not knowing what she was really on about.
“Hi all, not missed the show have I?” The tall well spoken man said as he looked about him. “Just why are we here anyway?”
“Take a pew and I’ll tell you.” Margaret patted the vacated seat of Dirk’s. She hoped he would get lost somewhere. “We are here to get a professional insight into how mental people think and what turns them into being mental.”
“Oh, like circumstances in life, bad experiences.”
“Yeah like eating the food you cook for them.” Robin quipped and got a hard stare back.
“Look my dear fellow, you want to cook for hundreds and get it ready by a certain deadline, you are more than welcome.”
“Sorry Andy.”
“Explain to the group why you cycle everywhere.” Margaret urged in order for all to learn from this man’s personal reason as to why.
“Cycling keeps you fit; road biking it the best, travel further and faster than mountain biking or other forms.”
“I’ve heard too much can make you incompetent.” Robin piped in with.
Andy shook his head. “That’s impotent, not incompetent; it can leave you numb and without the means to father children, also you don’t notice things happening.” He looked down at his seat as he felt warmth of a strange kind. “Oh blast wet myself again.”
“Ah, good got myself my seat back.” Dirk announced in triumph as he noted the cyclist goon run off.
“No Dirk....”
“Look a twit in those shorts.” He sniffed the air. “Smells a bit round here, is it your chemically metalled pants Dave?”
The desks seemed to part away from Dirk as he said this, oblivious to the damp smell emanating from his seat.